Quick Brown Fox, eh?

Remember, no quick brown fox is agile enough for a leap. And while we are at it, let me also tell you that Jackdaws have no romantic (or otherwise) interest whatsoever in any Gigantic Crystalline Animal-Deity.

Alt: Fox no Brown. Fox no Jump. Dog no Lazy. (P.S. : Fox no Quick too!)

Also Alt: (The conformist view) Exemplary Wizened Vicars Jump The Queue For The Kind God Above

Laying Some Demons to Rest

I recently noticed a couple of blogs I have started on my blogger account. This post is primarily to list 'em out and have a retrospection on when/why they were made. Here we go.

1. SaumyäSæz
[http://saumyajain.blogspot.com/] : This is my blog-a-la-originale. The authentic, the real McCoy, the right_from_the_horse's_mouth blog. I like to call it "My Rant". It has everything one could possibly know about me, or rather, at least everything I would let the world know about me. 81 posts including this one. The one that people know about, the one that I advertise. The one, that I write on. The one, that is me.

2. L.o.v.e.s.m.i.t.t.e.n.s.v.i.l.l.e
[http://luvbitten.blogspot.com/] : Once upon a time there was a guy who was smitten with love. Unreturned love. Or so he thought. Or so he did not. And thus he ended up bitten in love. This was supposed to be a "(s)pit-of-venom blog". Something to pour out, to vent out the anger, the inadequacy, the failure, the fall, the times, the promises, the quirkiness, the reality. It still has only one post. It will always have only one post. A post that I regret. A post that I shall never delete. Just to remind me never to write something like that again. Maybe, I guess, till I "fall" again.

3. A 100 days of solitude
[http://alifeinexile.blogspot.com/] : I will reproduce the only post this blog has, here.

Sunday, August 5, 2007
"An exile?"
"Yes."
"How? You are still around people you know."
"Yes, that is true. In physical terms, yes."
"Then?"
"Hmm... Well, it is an exile. Let's just leave it at that."

Akshay gives me a quizzical look. I smile back.

The idea to launch this blog came upon me a day before I wrote the luvbitten blog. It is after spewing out the spit of venom that I decided to end my 100 days of solitude on Day-2 itself. I realised that I was not ready for it then. A hundred days of solitude were meant as an experience to "grow", not to grow ugly and hateful. Thus ended my hundred days of exile, and so did the blog. (and so began my "Alter-Exile") But, unlike the "spit of venom blog", this is not a closed file. I know I shall come back to this again, although in very different circumstances and a totally different mindset. One day I shall be ready. It is then that I shall return to the blog, and to a hundred days of solitude, and hopefully, to a life in exile, away from "all this". What's "all this"? You'll know. Soon enough.

4. Posts on Love and Freedom, and Related Stuff :D
[http://luvandfreedom.blogspot.com/] : As the title says. This is for posts on Love, Freedom and Related Stuff. Hahahahah! Basically, it started out as an outlet for appreciating the finer things in life. It was there to remind me that I was not the only enlightened mind writing about human emotions. There have been lesser mortals before me who have succeeded in capturing intense emotions and packed them in words, mostly poetry. Basically, a place where I posted others' compositions centered around the strongest of human emotions, love and freedom. Sadly, given my age and circumstance, it boiled down to love more than freedom at that time, and soon I got so entangled with love that I actually stopped thinking about freedom, and if that was not enough, my posts on love too went on to merge with my rant blog, and so this blog became parched. I guess its time to renew this blog, now that my alter-exile is also over. And what better a post than Faiz's "Mujhse pehli si muhabbat mere mehboob na maang"

5. Science and Technology Council IITK
[http://scitech-iitk.blogspot.com/] : Originally meant as a General Secretary (I was "that" once, :D) writing about his council in IITK, I guess it had one discussion and everyone soon forgot about it. Maybe because it was seen as a propaganda thingy back then. It was an honest attempt to bring in some people to life. I guess IITK was not ready back then. With lately my intent of doing something crazy with the IITK junta having found a supporting voice with Arvind Kothari, the currently outgoing PREJIDENT SAAHIB ;), I guess this blog may be used to complete a much awaited discourse on "What ails IITK" and also in the future, become a platform for my thoughts about Science and Technology as well as my days of being the "Scitech-Oh Seven" in IITK, the time and place where I gained, lost, learnt, became, befooled, did, undid, follied, jollied ... myself. All by myself.

6. The Techkriti Blog
[http://techkriti-ohseven.blogspot.com/] : "Wake me up when Techkriti Ends" ... This was Rakshit's status message. Techkriti was the brand, Oh Seven was the catchline, Us, the salesmen. I am absolutely immodest when it comes to this. It was THE Techkriti. Honest to God, great intentions without any fear of what will happen. For most of the people, where it was "just another tech fest", for us it was a matter of life, prestige and passion. Still is. There will be better ones I am sure. But one thing that no one can take away from Oh Seven is, it was the one that started it all. Nanda's Techkriti, to a large extent, inspired us. It was a benchmark. But we had a better base with the participants, and so by the end of it, I can safely say, we made Nanda proud. True, it had its glitches, it had its misses, they all do. I take all responsibility. Truly. I do believe I was the weakest link in the whole chain. BUT, I was also the superglue, heheh. Anyhow, this blog was made around the run up to the fest but soon discarded just like the scitech blog. There is still time before I fill it up with "How-to-organise-a-students-fest" guideline. (I have actually thought of doing so. Call me crazy.)

Aww shucks. This too has become just like all the old ones. Filling me with remorse over all my past life. [life. or something like it ;) ... Now where did I pick that one up from?] Anyhow, I am learning to live with it. I am learning to live with myself. The bottomline is, I am learning. That, I guess, is enough for me.

IITK - Book of Institutional Harassment [3:14]

... and then the powers-that-be said, “and thou shalt hence be known as The Academically Deficient One, and by the instrument of this name thou shalt be treated as a lowly mongrel, and looked upon with suspicion wherever you go or in whatever you do, and any attempt that thee shall strive to make to clear thyself of this name shalt be trodded down upon sans mercy by us who are invested with the clout to do so.”

RKN ki Guide!

(Pre Script : This is my first attempt at dissecting a book. Please be soft on me.)

Okay, so I named it just like RGV ki AAG :) but that's where comparisons, and comedy, stops.

The Guide as a book was an exquisite piece of fiction, and the movie kept match. Well, if you haven't read the book or watched the movie, I suggest read the book first and then watch the movie. The book takes us through the life of a boy-turns-man-turns-saint and his adventures as a guide, a lover, a hoodwink, and finally as a person.

The portrayal of characters is as real as it can get. There are no black or white characters, they are all just human, having their own shares of fallibilities, weaknesses and villiany as well as our keep of fame, money and power. The protagonist, while on one hand is a gentleman, a passionate person with a zeal for life, and who also finally puts up his very survival at stake for what he himself at a point thought of as a stupid superstition. A Hero? But Wait! At the same time, he is also in love with another man's woman, elopes with her and then even lives off her talents. It even seems that he made money by cheating her in business!

The book shows us the nature of humanity. No one's proverbially 'good' and no one's proverbially 'bad'. Rosie, the woman, is a dancer. She uses her womanly charms to catch hold of this smart guide and gets rid of her old husband to whom she is supposed to be avowed for seven births. She gets him to leave his mother, gets him to make her famous, and when he has done that, wants him to go back to the old days. Aren't we all like that?

We strive for progress. We toil for success. And once we have it, we reminisce about the "good old relaxed days". Why is it so? I could not figure it out. The book told me a lot of things that showed me that it IS so, but the cause eluded me. For a long time, I pondered over this question. And then I found the answer, or at least something that left me with some sort of satisfaction. I still haven't gotten the "Why" but just read on what I got, and you'll know why the "why" doesn't bother me anymore.

Oddly enough, the solution (or something like it, as I have already mentioned) came from the movie version of the book. Its a song that the movie opens with, and here are the lyrics. I would like to try an English version of it, but till then, let's just keep it to this itself.

Wahaan kaun hai tera, musaafir, jaayega kahaan?
Dam lele ghadi bhar, ye chhaiyaan, paayega kahaan?

Beet gaye din, pyaar ke palchhin,
Sapna bani woh raaten...
Bhuul gaye woh, tu bhi bhula de,
Pyaar ki woh mulaaqaaten.
Sab door andhera, musaafir jaayega kahaan?

Koi bhi teri, raaha naa dekhe,
Nain bichhaaye naa koi...
Dard se tere, koi naa tadpa
Aankh kisi ki naa royi.
Kahe kisko tu meraa, musaafir jaayegaa kahaan?

Ho musaafir, tu jaaye-gaa kahaan?

Kahate hai gyaani, duniya hai faani,
Paani pe likhi likhaayi...
Hai sabki dekhi, hai sabki jaani,
Haath kisike naa aayi.
Kuchh teraa naa meraa, musaafir jaayegaa kahaan?

This was sung by S. D. Burman in his oh-my voice. Here's a video link.
Yeah, so that was that. I don't know if I made a lot of sense, but heck, it makes sense to me. :)

From the 90s and still there.

I am a retro.
I grew up in the 90s.
A good part of me still lives in those times. No matter how much I try to keep pace with the times, I am stuck!

Wanna know why? Here's 50 reasons, in no particular order...

1. The never ending mythical cultural dose of Mahabhaaaarat, Ramayana, Shri Krishna, well maybe even Alif Laila on DD1

2. Oh yes and talking about DD1 ... Surabhi, Tehkikaat, Byomkesh Bakhshi, Nukkad, Circus, Hum Log, Chanakya, Shanti, Swabhimaan and the Saturday waali fillum and the Sunday shaam waali fillum.

3. Do I hear more? Yeah, DD2, the Superhit Muqabla, the Rangoli, the Chitrahaar, the video "albums", the non-stop 24 hour channel, the Govinda and Rajnikant movies, the Regional language films, the late night English flicks from the 70s, the NFDC art films! Heck even the "Munna zara paas ki dukaan se namak toh le aa" (IODISED NAMAK campaign), "ORS ka ghol", "Mile sur Mera Tumhaara", "Ek Titli, Anek Titiliyaan"

4. The Kiddie specials - Talespin, Duck Tales, Tom and Jerry at 7:00 a.m., Guchha, Daanu Danasur, Alladin, Disney Hour, Alice in Wonderland (Tap tap topi topi topi jo duube), Potli baba ki, Mulla Nasruddeen :)

5. Taking "money" to school to buy Crax from the DPS-EOK canteen, making a very long face in case you lost the money, and trying to explain how you would make up for it.

6. Watching jingles like : Washing Powder Nirma ... , Lifebuoy hai jahan ... , Bol Sakhi Bol tera raaz kya hai ;) ... , Humaara Bajaj ... , Vicco Turmeric nahin Cosmetic ... , Babool babool paise wasool ... , Dhoondte reh jaaoge ... , Joote mein hai light ... , Hum do humaare do ... , Melody khaao khud jaan jaao ... , Coffee or toffee ... , Maggi hot and sweet tomato "chilli" sauce, its different ... , Jab main chhota bachcha tha ... , Asli masaale sach sach ... , Liril girls ... , Lux adverts ... , Haan bhai haan, Coldarin li? ... , Saatth saal ke boodhe ya saatth saal ke jawaan? ... , Raju tumhaare daant toh motiyon jaise chamak rahe hain ... , Bhala usski saaree meree saree se safed kaise? ... ,

7. The aampapad/chooran waala who used to sit in front of the school gate. Or the Kwality icecream waala, hey even the Kwarly or Quality icecream waala. And how can one forget the 2 rupees ki kulfi.

8. When V.P (Singh) caused a nationwide bandh (Mandal Riots) and then P.V. (Narasimha Rao) took over and got us a stable government. What the heck, did we even care? ... Economic Liberalisation by the sardar uncle in the Blue pagdi (Manmohan Singh) whom Papa and Joshi uncle would ardently listen to every March for some strange discussions on "budget"

9. Speaking of budget, Ma and Papa writing their daily hisaab at night and doing the books to see how to plan for our bright future.

10. The Cricket World cup of 1996, the Eden Gardens burning, Kambli crying ... Azhar, Kapil, Sachin ... Match fixing, Cronje getting killed, oh man!

11. Nasnal eleksons, all the time, post PVNR ... I.K. Gujral, Hardhanhalli Dodde Deve Gowda (I memorised this one for my GK exam) ... Pa and Ma proudly showing off the black tickmarks on their fingernails everytime they voted (and probably it was all the time) ... Photo Voter I Cards.

12. A time when a telephone in your house was a luxury. Oh and wait, there was these long queues at the local STD-PCO after 9:00 to talk to my Nanaji in Kanpur or Tauji in Muzaffarnagar.

13. Knowing the mohalla waalaas as "16 wali aunty" and "17 waali aunty" ... "Roorkee waale tauji", "Modinagar waali buaji" ... "Pinky didi" ... "Bittoo bhaiyya"

14. School "picnic" to Lodi Garden or Humayun's tomb. Planning in advance and ending up just rolling down the slopes. Or Maybe Appu Ghar, Delhi Zoo, Or the National Science Center, Rail Museum, Bal Bhavan, Shankar's Library, Doll's Museum.

15. Chacha Chaudhary, Billoo, Pinky, Saboo, Raman, Channi Chachi.

16. Manorama, Sarita (with Shrimatiji) and Grihashobha (Bunai special) and then Ma became "mod" so Women's Era. Heh heh heh ... and then "we" grew up a bit so, adieu to Champak, Nandan, Nahe Samrat, Balhans and hello to Cine Blitz and Filmfare. Super Commando Dhruv and Nagaraj stayed, though.

17. Endless games of scrabble with Ma, Pa, me and Joshi uncle. Loads of board games with KJ, I DO mean LOADSSSSS! Still have more than 20 games saved.

18. Garmiyon ki holidays!!! Chhutti chhutti and Tarramtoo on DD, Nani ke ghar ki trip (Sleeper class mein half ticket, hahaha!), last week mein holiday homework!

19. Cricket with the muhalla. Fighting for batting, and then howling when getting out ... and then when all else failed ... threatening to go away 'coz the bat was mine :)

20. Making charts for the class board, giving the thought for the day or the news in the morning assembly, then later on debates, declamations, quizzing, clay modelling, "spring house" prefect, bombs going away in school toilets, class monitors, forgetting the tie in the assembly, nail size checks and duster waali punishment, "go stand at the back of the class", and oh yes ... moral science classes!

21. And yes ... Vinod reminds me ... sex education ... reading the agony aunt, vyaktigat samasyaaein, "sharmaayein nahi humse poochhein" (Thanks to Vivek for this!) etc. columns of newspaper to expand our sexual knowledge, chhup chhup ke :)

22. On the same note ... a short skirt was a treat to the eyes, a mini skirt on TV and ma would cover your eyes, and a bikini was blasphemy! Beyond that, we couldn't even imagine!!! Our share of titillation? Karishma Kapoor singing "sexy sexy sexy mujhe log bolein" in skimpy nothings ... Govinda crooning "meri pant bhi sexy" with his gyrations, et cetera. ... oh and how can I forget ... Madhuri (the queen of seething hearts) and her "choli ke peechhe" uproar! For the real perverted guys, there was the morning show listing on the Hindi newspaper, while the classy ones like me preferred "watching" Delhi Times (oh once an NIE volunteer told us ... everyone "watches" DT, no one "reads" it ... that is the way it is to be used). By the way, just for the ones who are interested, DT started out as a Tuesday supplement, then gradually from a 2-day to 4-day it became a regular, remember? :)

23. Stapoo, Pitthoo, Chhupan Chhupaai, Pakdam Pakdaai, Vish-amrit, Four corners, beech ka bichhoo, Chain-chain, Tennis ball se football khelna, "Jab miss mary chhoti thi toh unki aadat aaise thi...", "Das patte tode ek patta kachcha...", "Posham pa bhai posham pa, lal quile mein kya hua?...", "I sent a letter to my father, on the way i dropped it ...",

24. Saanp seeddhi, Ludo, 3-2-5, Rummy, Laad, Patte-pe-patta, Rang-mila-le-rang, Business, The Game of Life

25. Maggi, Thums up, Citra, Gold Spot, 7UP, Canada Dry, Tawa pizza, Brown Bread, Mother Dairy ke doodh ke sikke, Wimpys, Nirulas, Nice Biscuits, Monaco,

26. Aishwarya, Sushmita, Aamir, Shahrukh. On another level there was Sunny, Sanjay and Salman, Akshay. Babes? Karishma, Raveena, Rambha, Ramya, Divya Bharati (and her sudden death) ... Goddess? Madhuri.

27. Paras, Odeon, Priya, Amba, Regal.

28. Alaknanda, Kalkaji, Tara Apartments, Lajpat Nagar, Palika Bazaar, South Ex.

29. Maruti 800, Maruti Gypsy, Maruti 1000, Maruti Zen, Maruti Esteem. All Maruti. Or maybe the FIAT Padmini and the 118NE, Ambassador and Nova.

30. Then ... Santro and Matiz!

31. He-man, GI Joes, Trump Cards, Barbie doll sets, Hot Wheels!

32. The weekly movie that used to play at 16-waali-aunty's "imported" VCR and the whole of the mohalla's aunties with their chunnus and munnus sitting round to watch.

33. Janmashtami ki jhaankis made by all the didis and bhaiyyas of the neighbourhood.

34. Clandestine love affairs between the same didis and bhaiyyas of the mohalla, one of them even had a marriage :)

35. Aaloo ke papad and aam ke achaar being put out to ferment in the sun.

36. Pakistani plays on Mamaji's VCP, which he had got in "dahej" when he married my beautiful Mamiji.

37. The joint family met at least once a year. Every year played witness to more than 3 marriages (of my cousins or someone!) Every marriage used to go on for weeks, and it would mean meeting up my cousins and loads of comics and chocolates! and Gende ke phool ki fights, gende ke phool ka cricket match, sleeping with cousins on terraces, Bittoo bhaiyya ki ragging ke kisse, Chunnu bhai ki kahaaniyaan, Nishu ki girlfriends, ha ha ha!!!

38. Sans shopping malls, the only places we bought our clothes were from Chunmun, Ritu wears, Snowhite or Shyam's. The only places we did go to eat was Sagar and the likes ... we had pet shops for all purchases ... and the major ration used to be bought from Khari Baoli in Old Delhi.

39. It was a time when everything was semi-automatic ... Refrigerators that required defrosting through the little red button, Washing machines that saw mom wrestling and jostling out all over the house with clothes ... In fact, even now, years later since she has gotten herself an automatic front loading version, she still plays out her old schedule everytime the clothes are laundered.

40. A microwaves oven, a personal computer, a dining table, a new bed, a fully automatic fridge, a water purifying system other than the ceramic-candle-filter, were all items that were put on the wishlist every year and then were pushed down in priority because of other pressing expenditures, like children's clothing, children's books, children's fees, children's savings. We really owe it to our folks for what we are. They missed out on the best years of their lives so that we could enjoy ours.

41. Suraj Kund ka mela!

42. Begging and crying for a T.V. Video Game on my 9th birthday. Exchanging cartridges with friends. Endless Tennis, Mario, Street fighter and Spartan bouts. Oh, and Double Dragon and Contra!

43. Back to DD. Forgot to add the ones that we never watched. The UGC programs, the Akhil Bhartiya something something which showed classical dance and music, Krishi Darshan, National News (Papa was the only one who watched it). And the ones we did ... Turning Point, Living on the Edge, The World This Week, Kya aur Kaise. Once again, the first ever TV soap for children ... Hint? "Jungle jungle baat chali hai pata chala hai ... chaddi pehen ke phool khila hai phool khila hai!"

44. "Chandrakaanta (ting a ding)... ki kahaani (dham!) ... yeh maana (ting a ding) ... hai puraani (dham!) ... yeh puraani (ting a ding) ... hokar bhi (ting!) ... badi lagti (ting a ding) ... hai suhaani (dham!) ... sorry people this thing warranted a special place! So did Krur Singh and Shikha Swaroop (who has been immortalised in this role, coz this is the only one she ever did!!!)

45. The Pragati Maidaan fairs ... World Book Fair, World Trade Fair - toys section, books sections, food section!

46. Kumar Sanu, Anuradha Paudwaal, Udit Narayan, Mohd. Aziz, Alka Yagnik, Kavita Krish.

47. That reminds me of "Yeh aakaashvaani hai, abhi studio ki ghadi mein shaam ke aath bajkar chhabbees minute ho rahe hain. Abhi abhi aapne Manju Sharma se hindi ke samachaar sune..." and "...geet gaaya hai Kumar Sanu aur Anuradha Paudwal ne, bol hain Sameer ke aur sangeet Anand Milind ka hai" and "Yeh hai VIVIDH BHARATI!" ... Speaking of which, those little Transistors which everyone used to glue to their ears, especially when a cricket match was being aired. AIR rocked!

48. Katti-Abba :)

49. Dekh Bhai Dekh and Zabaan Sambhaal Ke. Street Hawk and Knight Rider. I Dream of Jeannie and Bewitched.

50. "Teri Chopsy ho gayi!" :)

I could go on and on with this one. Haven't even started out on the Zee TV programs and the Star Plus with its humble beginnings, heh.

Too high on nostalgia right now to continue rambling. If there is ANNYTHING you feel I have missed out ... continue the list on the scrapbook!

Adios!

Random Thought No. 001 : Brutal honesty eh?

"Being too honest reflects a serious lack of tact"

[Reader warning : Rant coefficient almost unity. For most of the visitors, the quote above should be all that they take away from here. Still the whole story follows for the inquisitive ones.]

One need not be too honest, neither with others, nor with one's own self. This has been pointed out to me time and again by a lot of people around. I am told that being honest just for the sake of telling the truth as it is is really not the name of the game. Or rather than calling it a game, we have a very good word for it, it's called TACT.

One needs to have tact, to be able to put things across in the most slightest of manner, and in a way that they would be noticed and still not be taken offence of. That cannot be achieved by a single minded quest for the truth itself. No sirree, that's not the way to go about it at all! All it requires is a little thinking on your part and a little knowledge about the other party in the vocal or physical transaction.

For a person like me who is definitely *tactless*, let me try to analyse what this attribute really is. I'll start with some questions and build it up. Let's see where we go from here.

1. Is it about being dishonest? Not so. I wouldn't call a tactful person a dishonest one. But at the same time, would I call him/her guileless? No, I wouldn't (Yes. You might, so what, we can always disagree!) The way I see it is, its like using the truth as a tool to reach an end.

2. Is it about being smart? Very much so. If one is smart, one WILL be tactful. If one is not tactful, then one is dumb. At least that is what is on the face. I'm blunt, and I'm called an idiot on multiple occasions, and yes, I'm on first hand familiar terms with the word dumb! I don't know how to treat people well, and I hurt them for no reason at all, but for my philosophy of serving the pie as it is. And it is true to a large extent. One should have enough brains to know what to say when and to whom, even though it is the truth, but one should exercise some restraint sometimes. So, yes, it IS about being smart. Which I do not claim to be.

3. The technical alibi. I had noted back there, that tact is basically empoying truth as a tool to reach an end. Whether the end is good or bad, selfish or selfless, right or wrong for that matter ... all that is very subjective and depends on how one approaches the whole thing, but as long as you are on the right side of humanity (whether or not the right side of morality, which itself has its own unique definition to every individual), you're allowed to use the truth to reach that end. The means of using the truth to your advantage might not be morally correct, but then at the end of the day, you are not dishonest, you are not hurting anyone, so you come clean.

4. (Most interesting) Does one really need to be tactful? Well, I have survived 22 years (minus two) sans tact. I have had rough time, paid my share of dues for not having this "vital" component on today's sociehety and it is now that I am having second thoughts about this which is precisely the reason why I am writing the post.

<Diversion 1 : Why this post?>
So I am sitting in my room, and just randomly thinking when I think about how tactless I am and how blunt I am taken to be. For the past few months, I have been using what I later discovered is called 'mindwriting'. Umm, not exactly mindwriting, but the concept is similar. When I am brewing over with some philosophical dilemma, or just some question troubling me, I start writing, spew out everything I have in mind on the paper, or the keyboard. Most of the time, I start seeing some way out of the dilemma or the problem at hand. The trick is to write everything that comes to your mind and then read it. As one writes, as one's thoughts are formed, one starts analysing the good and the bad, the strong and the weak, and then the situation clears up by itself.

So the reason I am writing this random thought is to clear up my stand on my being tactful, or the lack of it. Let's see how it develops. I have no idea as I write this. True, once I am through, I shall edit it out and remove the really crappy things, hehe, but yes, I want to record this process of clearing up my mind as an overall exercise in mindwriting.
</Diversion>

So coming back, does one need to be tactful?

Well, that depends.

That depends on what kind of a person you are. One thing that I can definitely say, if you are not tactful, you'll not be able to befriend everyone coz you'll be too blunt to make everyone happy, but the ones who do become your mates, will have very deep bonds with you. On the other hand, a tactful person would always have a couple of people around to share a joke with, have a laugh and move on in life. They are the happier lot. Or at least, they do seem to be.

Furthermore, if one is a puritan, then any form of manipulation of the truth is a falsehood, an illusion and an attempt to deceive. Whereas for a practical person, truth cannot be manipulated, but it definitely can be shown to someone in a manner he or she wants to see it. That's tact.

It's like advertising and marketing. You need to sell what they'll buy. If you don't have the goods they need, package them in a way that they are tempted to buy. If even the packaging doesn't lure them in, offer a discount!!! There's nothing wrong in that as long as they are buying it out of their own free will, isn't it? For the salesman, its just ringing in the cash registers that is important ... for the consumer, consuming is important. In this age when individual demands are much more important than societal development, this automatically becomes the thumb rule. Sell and buy. I've been told that this is how the human mind works. Everything's a transaction. Is it? Well maybe, but why isn't it so for me? Was I made differently? I can't believe it to be true. I think we are just closing a channel because its either too difficult to follow, too unrewarding in this present world, or maybe yes, too impractical!

But I believe in absolutes. The fact that there are no absolutes per se, doesn't hold here because I believe that every human being knows where to draw the line between moral and immoral, the right and the wrong, the truth and the lie. Everyone of us knows what is the truth and what is not. Sometimes though, we just grow up and teach ourselves new definitions. Maybe we brainwash ourselves away from it. But yes, ab initio, we all know. I don't sell, I don't buy. I don'r market. I don't advertise. I just cut the truth up in little little cubes and ration it out to anyone and everyone who cares to notice.

At the same time, one needs to be careful in distinguishing ideas and opinions from the facts. In being brutally honest about the facts, one cannot be very judgemental about one's own opinions, that would definitely be unjust. Opinions don't count. The facts do. Maybe later than sooner. They hurt, they pinch, they remain static for long after they have been put forth, but they are just that, the facts. Nobody can deny them. That is why an argument based on facts is solid as a fortress. So, being brutally honest has its own takes as well.

All said and done, its basically about your own comfort. The only person you have to be comfortable with after all, is your own self. One may be comfortable by stating the truth on an as-is-where-is basis and then leave it to the sensibilities of the other party. For someone else, their viewpoint of being comfortable might to see to it that everyone around them is happy and they have a role in it. That's a very genuine concern as well. Its basically a difference of ideology. While the first one is more like a traditional reformatory approach, the other one is like a modern indulgent soft approach. Both work. Both are acceptable. It depends on you. It also depends on whom you apply it to. As well as when.

Hmm, now for the results.

Honesty? Yes.
Brutal honesty? Umm, maybe not so brutal.
Tact? Not really my piece of cake.
Self regulation? Definitely.
Solution? Look inwards, introspect and improve. Once through, then look outwards and demand a better world. But first, one needs to prepare oneself to be able to be justified in making that demand.

On the opening quote, 'Being too honest reflects a serious lack of tact', I agree.
Couldn't care less though!

That's it for now.

Back?!

Yep, it seems I couldn't stay away from this place for long. The blogging vibes soon got back to me and thus I am here! It's almost an addiction. No mater how much you try to quit, it sucks you back right in.

I feel I owe an explanation for all the hulaabaloo going on. Sometime back, I had decided to stop blogging for good. The reasons, I did not know exactly, however, I kind of figured I had to stop my blabberings. Maybe it was the old going-into-a-shell syndrome that keeps happening to me again and again, or maybe because of the turn of events that I have been witness to recently, really give meaning to < quote >...as things stand now, there's nothing to say, nothing to think, nothing to discuss, absolute zilch.< / quote > The "turn of events" is a bit inolved story and I wouldn't bother you with that. Just that it wasn't something I would be boasting about to my grandchildren, hehe!

Anyhow, whatever it was, it has passed, and soon with my proverbial life proverbially back on the proverbial track (henh!) I am all ready to start off again.

To the casual reader, this (15 odd days) is the typical time gap between posts on my blog generally, and with which information someone might just assume that nothing actually happened, I'll differ. It is definite that the comeback to blogging is just as serious as the decision to quit. When I had quit, I really wanted to. The blogs and the posts lately had been too specifically oriented in one direction and truly lacked my overall profoundness (yes, i am a narcissist, so sue me!) In simple terms, I was writing either only about mushy things, or only about depressing things (one and the same). That is something that is just not me. Although if you would know me, I have been so for quite some time now. Depressed and mushy. Just like a blob of deflated candy floss. At which point I think, I could take it no more, and told myself, no more depressing and mushy things to talk about. At least not the depressing part. And at the same time, try to get over the fixation for the cutie, pinky stuff.

And once the machine was stopped, things started improving on other fronts, independent of this event, and I kinda got hold of myself. Life cleared up, I again have things to tell, ideas to discuss, people to deconstruct, events to describe, emotions to dissect, and rants to get out of my system. Who knows, maybe more.

So, Saummy's back. Hopefully to stay for long. Hopefully having more to talk about than just his mindless rantings about himself and his life. Maybe something meaningful as well. Definitely something worth your time. Whoever you are, wherever you are. We promise to deliver hence(TM). Or, as the Tatas would put it, more blog per blog. :)

Keep reading, and commenting.

P.S : Or if you may so believe, it was a cheap publicity trick to garner awws and tcho-tchos from the readers of this blog, and then I could have been back "on public demand". But unfortunately, I got only 3 responses, one of whom was visitng my blog for the first time (!), hence whatever the trick was, it bombed! :) So, I am sheepishly trying to restart the machine. Hate me, Kill me!

P.P.S : Love you Ravi, love you Vinod. At least you guys noticed me (or the lack of me). (sniff!) Respects even towards the kind lady who had been on my blog after I had visited hers, and managed to write something good back here. The rest of you, who are just too busy or find Saumyasaez too boring, I think you have a surprise coming up in the next few weeks. Watch this space.

Goodbye, and thanks for all the fish.

Dear Reader,

This is meant to be a goodbye post. The author of this blog shall not be writing anymore, there won't be any more posts/material on this blog henceforth.

Here's a thank you for bearing with me all the time, and here's hoping I resume this activity soon, sometime in my life. But as things stand now, there's nothing to say, nothing to think, nothing to discuss, absolute zilch. I have a few drafts handy, maybe in my effort to clean up my baggage I'll complete those as I go along, but yes, officially, no more stuff to be blogged.

Saumyasez no more.

Random Thought No. 666 : Hum Chlormint Kyun Khaate Hain?

Well, so if you don't know what Chlormint is, (a) you don't need to waste your time on this post and (b) if you still wanna do that, here's where to start, not that this page is any informative, but then you just need to know this.

Ok, so, "hum chlormint kyun khaate hain?". Here are some introspections.

• ... taaki Praty ki moochhon ki kheti hamesha hari bhari rahe
• ... kyunki pan/cigarettewaale ke paas chhutte paise nahin hote
• ... taaki ghar par pata na chale ki sutta maara hai
• ... bekaaj, Chlaarmint ij MAI CHOEES.
• ... saadi Chlormint da jawaab nahi
• ... kyunki Chlormint ko peeya nahi jaa sakta
• ... kyunki peene ke liye toh Limca hai
• ... waise Sprite bhi hai.
• ... kyunki "hum" Kanpur mein rehte hain, agar dilli mein rehte, toh hum poochhte, "main" chlormint kyun khaata hoon?
• ... kyunki hum fukke nahi khaana chahte
• ... kyunki Chlormint humko nahi khaa sakti
• ... kyunki deepu bahut lamba hai aur prinshul bahut hi dhakkan
• ... kyunki saumya ke paas exam mein aur koi kaam nahi hota blog likhkar timepass karne ke allaawa ...

Issliye hum Chlormint khaate hain. Kuchh chamka ab? :)

Random Thought No. 9 : Questions

• Is it the end, or is it the beginning?
• Why do we do what we do?
• Was it always meant to turn out like this?
• IF not, then how was it meant to be?
• Can something I do or anything I can do, have an impact significant enough to change the scheme of things that be, and things that are to become?
• IF so, how? why?
• Are YOU a part of this? Is anyone? Isn't everyone?

Guess that's some food for thought.

The I-Hate-My-Life post

Right now, I hate my life.
I just hate it.
For no particular reason.

I am sick of the way I am, sick of the way I live, the way I think, the way I work. I am just so sick of it all right now. Its like everything I do or think of doing, defines "sick"

I am so yellow, so sick sick sick.
And I don't know what to do!

Oh damnit! Why did it have to come to this?

Random Thought no. 42 : what do we learn at IIT

Yep, this is a new thing on this blog, and I'll post 'em under the title "Random Thought"s. Each "random thought" will be assigned a not-so-random_ number ... wait, wait wait ... well that's debatable, at the end it IS a random pick from a finite list of numbers I have in mind :| ... anyhow, back to where we were ... so a not-so-random number shall be assigned to the incumbent thought while it is being posted on "the blog".

Each random thought, as it were, would have a short but precise idea thrown upon at the reader to (hopefully) stimulate his (or her, if you may so please) senses/ego/spirituality etc. and shall also carry some background about its origin. Well, if I am in a good mood, I'll also post the significance of the random number so assigned to the random thought.

So here's this time's dose. Ladies and Gentlemen, Random Thought number 42.

Scene : Vivek Madnani and Saumya Jain, sipping away Sprites at MT (that dingy, stinking place frequented by early risers, late sleepers, class bunkers, samosa seekers ... basically one and all from IIT). Kaboom! Madnani gets a flash of insight and thus he spake...

One thing that IIT teaches you is to accept defeat.

We come in here as heroes, each in his/her own right, struggling through school, all lamps burning, all engines fired, all horses on ... oh well yes, in short, we come in after a good fight, as champs.

Then, the dream-run ends.

Everyone starts expecting/assuming/presuming that yeah this guy is a slog-horse. Let's just get him. Everyone. Friends, society, teachers, professors. Everyone! "Oh yes you are an IITian, blah blah blah ... should know ... blah blah blah ... should handle ... blah blah blah ... should slog away like everyone else ... blah blah blah ... should do this ... blah blah blah. What they forget, the IITian included, is that this is at the end of the day, an "educational insititution". It is expected to provide education, not distribute it away and expect people to lap it up! We slog horses, slog as expected, slog slog slog slog and slog.

And then, we lose. We lose to ourselves.

We just lose. BIG TIME. And what do we feel about it? Nothing. That's what we are taught here. Lose and stay down. Don't fight. It's not gonna change anything. As long as you get your degree in time, its all fine. Stay hungry, stay foolish, stay selfish. Be a jerk all your life!

Enough random rant. Don't you think so?

---
and 42 ... next time folks, my head's starting to hurt a bit.

errm ... tagged [!] / [:)] / [:?]

[Spoiler : Long post, written in a mood of vengeance, and a pinch of I.M. (don't ask me what that means...its close to B.S, a little on the deranged side though)

So, I was "tagged" here by Shubha, one lovely lady I know from school. To make it more interesting, she realised that I hadn't taken notice of the whole "saumya-jain-has-been-tagged" thing because I had not seen the aforementioned post on her blog, coz I hadn't checked her blog for a long long time, and that's coz I had been kinda stuck up somewhere important (saving that for later). So she had to do that extra effort and reminded me on a chat that, well, I had been tagged.

There I was, chatting to her about how sick my life was, how I was planning to change it all, how the people in my life were goofing up with themselves, how I was falling apart for a silly thing (saving ALL that for later as well) when I get bombed by her TAG. And I do the silly thing ... I ask her what it means.

Now Shubha told me a bit about it, and I could figure it out, going through her "tagged!" post. But then, looking back, I kindof find it insulting to me to have asked that question. Am I not supposed to know? Well I did not, but I could have made out, had I read Shubha's post. She linked me to the post 'coz after that I was supposed to know what getting tagged means. But I didn't, I just felt comfortable knowing at the back of my mind that yes, I had been tagged and that was that.

We live in a fast-food world. We take things as we are told them. We don't explore, we don't think by ourselves. [ideas courtesy "The Weatherman", "Thank you for Smoking"] Wanna see an example? I linked to her post in the beginning of this post, hoping that by the time you read T.H.I.S. you would have gone through that and thus know what being tagged means. Well...Do you?

:)

First read her post, then you can go on to mine. Its up there.

"Fi.L.L.Ex", or, "Musings before an exam"

I sit down to write this on the "eve" (if you may deem it so, its 2:30 a.m. actually!) of my Flight Mechanics Mid Term examination...so it's gonna be short and snappy.

The First Law of the Last Exam (Fi.L.L.Ex) :
The last examination of any series of exams has the inherent property that deems it doomed the day it is announced.

Fi.L.L.Ex. for Dummies :
(Read "For the Mathematically Uninitiated")
In a string of examinations, like the Mid Semesters, the End Semesters or whatevathehell, the subject whose examination is scheduled on the last slot of 'em all, is bound to be fudged up by the incumbent(look it up!) examinee.

Proof :
This proof is going to be chiefly theoretical in nature, and investigations shall be made so as to cover all the possible outcomes, of which only the said event is designated to occur, as we shall soon see.

Now supposing you have N exams in M days.

The Nth exam is scheduled on the Mth day, which is the last slot of your examinations.

Now let us denote your Average Performance Satisfaction (APS -> Your self-evaluation for the N-1 exams) by a value amidst the following :-

APS -> Interpretation
0...Whoops! Exams? Shit! Uh-Oh!!! (Seriously fudged 'em up)
1...Hmm, Exams? Yeah, had 'em, gave 'em. (I don't care)
2...Well, well, well, Exams? Yeaaah! (Yaay! I'm gonna top this time!)

So, once we have decided upon your APS, we can correlate the APS with the performance in the final exam.

Case APS==0 : Now since you have really not performed well in the other exams, you don't have any motivation/self-confidence/desire to perform well in this one as well. Basically we are talking about "Oh I am so much deep in this, I just can't get any deeper, so what the hell! I just can't study!" kind of a feeling.

Case APS==1 : Hey you are one guy/gal who doesn't care about the exam. How can the exam care about you? Case closed. Getting screwed up is the result.

Case APS==2 :I bet you are already so so SO elated at cracking the other exams, you'll be puffed up with confidence, and eventually will not study for the final one. Classic case of "I am the king of the world" syndrome.

Thus, it is seen that the examination, unfortunately will be screwed up.

Corollary 1 to Fi.L.L.Ex :
Although the APS value seemingly has an inductive effect on the performance in the last paper, however, by virtue of the argument stated in proving Fi.L.L.Ex above, has absolutely no implication on the result thereof.
.
.
.
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GOD SAVE MY FLIGHT MECHANICS EXAMINATION...

The AboutMe Post

Now the first post announcing my arrival to the blog-o-sphere done, I sit down to write my first "meaningful" post.

What could count as a meaningful post? I mean, what do I blog about?

Do I blog about myself?
Do I write about things in my life?
About things going on around?
About things that "should be" going on around?
Do I write poems/stories/articles and post here?
Do I vomit out anything about anything that comes to my mind?
Or do I just see what happens and let things flow?

I really don't know.

Well, for starters, I can talk about myself. That is one thing I do well. If you know me personally you'll know what I am talking about. But then even if you don't, I guess you WILL at the end of this post.

Let's make it more interesting. Let me frame it like a FAQ...

Q. Who is Saumya Jain?

A. Saumya Jain is...

• ...male, Indian, b. Jan 7 1985
  
• ...a student of Aerospace Engineering at the Indian Institute of Technology Kanpur
  
• ...a very vehla(adj. "someone who has all the time in the world to do all the nonsense under the sun, or the moon, if you rather!") person
  
• ...available for gup-shup(v. "chatting") anytime you want
  
• ...a difficult-to-handle friend (ask my friends, the close ones)
  
• ...relatively easy to be overawed by anybody. Sometimes even a two year old can put me into self-contemplation
  
• ...definitely a non-conformist, ego-ecccentric, sadistic, procastinating, burnt-out genius
  
• ...a blatantly honest and blunt mouth
  

And before I forget,

• ...hopelessly in love with someone :)
  

Guess that does it for today.

More FAQs next time, promise.

~Enjoy the little things, for one day you might look back and realise that they were the big things~

The First 'un

Hellow, dear fellow !

This is practically the first one in a long long time, and as they all say...

1,2,3...
Testing...
TESTING...

System checked. OK.

Watch this space. More to come.